cuuuuuuute :)

this is gonna be a record of my great spring break :) it's on its way!!


all nighter here I come!!!!!! nervousness about these tests start to take control!!

i savor every piece of you.

When time belongs to us, when the world opens its big oyster shell, when all we see is the road in front of us, chasing down the sun setting in our horizon, our fingers laced together in bravery, picking up the pieces along the way that puts light back in our souls...

this is when i'll know we've made something of ourselves. this is when i'll know we've found a couple answers to our questions, which beckon dozens more. this is when i'll know i'm doing something right, something my way. this is when i'll burst my seams and shed my skin and rub my flesh raw against yours just to have a hidden scar that will represent the many ways you healed me.

i still love this trail we're blazin'.

;)

don't worry, the train whil be coming soon.

sights and sensations and sounds and bodily reactions continue to evolve and be distorted. the sensation of reality is put into a time-warp, slowing down perception. everyday objects take on a completely new form. skin is transparent. rubber is texturized and solidified as it boils into magma. glass ripples like sound waves as the inherent energy between the atoms and molecules that it is composed of is now able to be sensed through sight. inanimate objects speak in tongues, and are perfectly understood. you are driven to catalog these brand-new feelings.

WTF?!?!?!?!

you put the coach in my ella.

lookit this sexy-ass lineup - - -

Friday, April 17th	Saturday, April 18th	Sunday, April 19th
A Place To Bury Strangers Alberta Cross Bajofondo Beirut Buraka Som Sistema Cage the Elephant Conor Oberst and the Mystic Valley Band Craze and Klever Crystal Castles Dear and the Headlights Felix da Housecat Franz Ferdinand Genghis Tron Ghostland Observatory Girl Talk Gui Boratto Leonard Cohen Los Campesinos! M. Ward Molotov Morrissey N.A.S.A. Noah and the Whale Patton & Rahzel Paul McCartney Peanut Butter Wolf People Under the Stairs Ryan Bingham Silversun Pickups Steve Aoki Switch The Crystal Method The Aggrolites The Airborne Toxic Event The Black Keys The Bug The Courteeners The Hold Steady The Presets The Ting Tings We Are Scientists White Lies	Amanda Palmer Amy Winehouse Ariel Pink's Haunted Graffiti Atmosphere Band Of Horses Billy Talent Blitzen Trapper Bob Mould Band Booker T Calexico Cloud Cult Crookers Dr. Dog Drive By Truckers Drop The Lime Electric Touch Fleet Foxes Gang Gang Dance Glass Candy Glasvegas Henry Rollins - spoken word Hercules and Love Affair Ida Maria James Morrison Jenny Lewis Liars Junior Boys Mastodon Michael Franti & Spearhead MSTRKRFT Surkin. Para One (Live) Superchunk The Bloody Beetroots The Killers Thenewno2 Thievery Corporation Tinariwen TRV$DJ-AM Turbonegro TV On The Radio Zane Lowe Zizek Club	Antony and the Johnsons Brian Jonestown Massacre Christopher Lawrence Clipse Friendly Fires Fucked Up Groove Armada (DJ Set) K'naan Late of the Pier Lupe Fiasco Lykke Li M.A.N.D.Y. Marshall Barnes Mexican Institute of Sound My Bloody Valentine No Age Okkervil River Paolo Nutini Paul Weller Perry Farrell Peter Bjorn and John Public Enemy Roni Size Reprazent Sebastien Tellier Shepard Fairey Supermayer The Cure The Gaslight Anthem The Horrors The Kills The Knux The Night Marchers Themselves Throbbing Gristle Vivian Girls X Yeah Yeah Yeah's

$270. plus airfare. plus camping. slit my wrists.

funniest 19 seconds of the week.

*besides "ohh mah, OHHHH MANNN!! OOHHHH MAAAANNN!!!"

upset.

there's just some things that people don't let come into view for all to witness and voice their opinion on. there's some things in our past that we don't care to repeat. there's just some things that are a part of us, that don't go away, that we can't let go of, that we can't let discontinue. you could call it a problem; it would only be a problem if you did it. but since i do it, it's called a part of me. that's what it is. that's what makes me happy. not just happy, but able to function.

i can't function.
i hate this.
and i have to have it back.
there's no excuses for myself.
i have to get it back.

i will be who i must be.
there's nothing that can stop me.
i must be happy.

this hurts.
miserably.

give me life.
i'm exhausted.

- - -

smother those preoccupations
blinding me through each soft curve
every definition
each streamlined ideal bit and piece
breezing by unconsciously.
they tell me things.
cataloged in just two piles
'don't be this' and 'better than',
they say 'work harder, harder!!
you are not there yet!!'
those piles
sit in your head too
i can feel them growing.
they are so heavy.
i'm so heavy.
turn up the heat, and i'll keep running.

.c

lovely.

[[[genuine....]]]